One kind of unpleasant anger is connected to idealistic expectations, which are unmet. Plus expectations can be workable and realistic or out of this world and with no true foundation in realism. Expectations are, in any case, just what you expect; they are not tested and accurate results that will routinely occur just because you desire them to do so. This is where unhealthy anger emanates. Individuals expecting things that are based on an ideal, and then become angry when their expectations are unmet. Certain individuals feel that it is there right to get something when there’s no sensible explanation why they should get it.
Another unhealthy type of anger arises when you do not accept responsibility for your own mistakes. This anger is based on attempting to escape the emotion of blame and embarrassment. Embarrassment is a feeling of fear that is created on the inside state of feeling defenceless, helpless and powerless. Embarrassment embraces the horrific viewpoint of being undeserving and unlovable. Embarrassment raises strong agonising emotional states of humiliation because of a worry of being viewed as incompetent.
The emotional state of embarrassment is a danger to the honesty of the self. Intolerable feelings of embarrassment hold you trapped in fear of being found out by others. When you’re held captive by shame, the apparent shortfalls inside yourself are extremely embarrassing that you’ll go to real extents to conceal the weak self. For example, shouting in fury at another individual to get them to back off!
Anger is capable of being switched when you experience remorse and are unable to admit to what you have done. Anger can be switched to prevent the extra unpleasant emotional states of shame and disgrace. Anger has the capacity to be “utilised” to shut down the negative feelings experienced internally of weakness and powerlessness, because anger is an easier emotion to experience. Plus it succeeds! Anger can be “utilised” to threaten and push the other individual to back off and end their condemnation too.
Anger then becomes the predominant sensation used to prevent feeling terrible internally. The routine of protecting yourself with the anger resistance develops into a learned behaviour of self-preservation. Anger becomes rooted as a protecting tool and you have difficulty giving it up. Anger can function to safeguard you against risk for the short term, however, it causes extra embarrassment as on a certain level you identify that what you’re doing is undesirable. The remorse and embarrassment of routinely angry people continues to grow as they avoid the negative emotions instead of managing them fairly.
Sensing Danger, Masking All of It With Anger And Then Shooting onto Another Individual
Anger, and the desire to appear great in order to safeguard the delicate sense of self-worth, is the root of chauvinist conduct, intimidation and hostility. Rejection, suppression, projection, and accusing other people are defence strategies that assist you to not experience guilt and shame. Accusing somebody else instead of looking at your own part of the problem is called projection. If you can recognise it, then you have got it!
Opinions, critiques and pigeonholing all act to set us apart from other people. Our efforts to project our individual agonising parts upon other individuals interfere with the development practice of the sender and the receiver. Opinions, being an either/or progression, detaches and splits us from others, God or our feeling of completeness.
Projections are a protective strategy where we overlook what we dislike about ourselves and become distressed regarding similar characteristic in another. They’re the disowned aspect of our personality. Accusing others safeguards us by interruptions and assists us by keeping a lid on the fear that awareness of our dark side may incite.
Projections guard us by maintaining a lid on the fear that awareness of our negative traits may inside. You project your own remorse and fury on to other people when you judge and pigeon-hole the other individual¹s behaviours instead of merely watching or seeing them. Carl Jung alleged that the projection defence works similar to a mirror in between the ego and the unconsciousness personality. The negative traits, which have been rejected, that have been knotting psychic energy up in the ego will be echoed in the individual¹s everyday encounter.
What you battle, continues. Projections are cautionary signs that something is not sorted within you. Carl Jung stated that if you’re not aware of and possess the darker characteristics of yourself, then you will project your personal negative suppressed habits on to other individuals.
The severity of your rage and projection depends on one or more of:
- 1.The magnitude of the harmful aspect within your inner self,
- 2. The extent of refusal that you have regarding this characteristic within yourself,
- 3. The desire of your heart to figure out this projection, opinion and critique.
Read on about Cruel Critiques, Denial, Shame and Victimisation Causes